Mondays are hard mom days for me.
Monday is my 'go grocery shopping, get laundry done and get the house back in order from the weekend' day and I have to get it all done by the time I have to leave for work at 2. Since I work Monday afternoons that also means I have to prep dinner, throw getting ready for work in there somewhere and get Reaghan down for her nap before I leave. I'm super blessed that Mark works from home on Mondays and I don't have to take Reaghan anywhere while I go to work, but Mondays sure do make for busy mornings here at home. Usually there is something on my check list that just doesn't get done - today it was vacuuming.
I know I've been really bad lately about being impatient and short tempered with Reaghan on Mondays. Maybe being 7 1/2 months pregnant adds to the weariness I feel, but I've definitely been feeling convicted about the fact that I shoo shoo her aside while I clean the kitchen, walk back and forth down the hallway with laundry baskets and rush her out the door to the grocery store. Most of the time my sweet girl likes to help me with all of my chores, especially laundry, and usually I love her company, but letting a 2 year old "help" you usually means its going to take you a little longer than it should to get something done. While in the moment I'm usually fine with it, if I look at the clock or start thinking about my next chore I begin to get frustrated at how little I've gotten done or how long its taking me and suddenly the joy that I should be finding in my work is gone.
Can I make a confession? One of the biggest challenges of motherhood for me is enjoying the day in spite of mess and my to-do lists. I like lists, I like accomplishing things and checking them off my lists, I like a clean house with no dishes in the sink and clean counters. I fear I choose being a housewife over being a momma too much and I know for sure this has been true on Mondays. I tend to think "let me just get this done and then I'll go read her that book" and that time to read books get's slimmer and slimmer as the morning goes by and I keep trying to get one more thing done before I sit down with her.
Recently I've been trying to make an effort to wake up before Reaghan during the week to have a quiet time and I've been reading this book called "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World." If you're familiar with the account of these sisters than I don't have to explain the gist of it to you, but it has been really good and very convicting to my "Martha" heart. After my devotion this morning, knowing how hectic Mondays feel for me, I committed to making an extra effort to stop and enjoy Reaghan in the middle of the busyness. To choose "mother" over "housewife". SO.... when she asked me to read her a book today I actually stopped after wiping the counter down and read her 2 books on the couch. I didn't try to squeeze in one more thing. After groceries were put away I stopped to color a picture of baby Jesus in the manger with her and heard her sing her very first made up song! You guys, it was precious. To the tune of Wheels on the Bus she sang "We are the wise men gifts we bring, gifts we bring, gifts we bring, to baby Jesus the new born king, we love baby Jesus." Before you get too impressed those are just some lines from one of her Christmas books that she's memorized (except for the "we love baby Jesus" party) but I thought it was adorable that she put it into a song! And how grateful I am that I didn't miss that today! Was that worth my house not getting vacuumed? Absolutely.
My prayer tonight for my Martha heart... Please, please, please remember that dishes will still be there tomorrow and so will the crumbs on the floor, but precious moments to hear made up songs and talk to her about Jesus can't always be recreated.